"I feel like all my life I’ve had a disordered relationship with food..."

I feel like all my life I’ve had a disordered relationship with food. I grew up watching my mum go from diet to diet and steadily gain weight with each failed attempt. In turn she suffered with low self esteem which led to her not being able to teach me how to have any sort of healthy body image or self confidence either.  

Join Zing Wellbeing program today to make a change in your life!

Janene is a Zing Wellbeing member and shares her story of constant yoyo diets for as far back as she can recall.

Janene shares, "As an adult I followed that same path of looking for the next diet, pill or plan that would solve all my problems and make me skinny while still eating and drinking whatever I wanted. As we all know these things do not exist.

I fell pregnant with my first child in 1998 when I was at my skinniest ever - 54kg. Well I gained 18kg throughout the pregnancy (probably needed to gain some!) and gave birth to a beautiful healthy baby boy.

My weight never really went down past 63kg after that for many years.

At 63kg I was healthy but all I saw when I looked in the mirror was how fat I was. I longed to gain back the size 6-8 figure I’d had. I went from diet to diet each one leaving me disillusioned, disappointed and with less self esteem. I didn’t lose a lot of weight and if I did I gained it back. The only thing I lost was my sense of self and any confidence I had left at all.

Fast forward to 2015. I had met my now husband and we got married and had my second child (17 years after my first). I was happy and content. I was a healthy weight and was beginning to feel good about myself again.

I became a consultant for the Healthy Mummy and was inspired and motivated and by helping others become healthy. I felt like I was making a difference. Life was good. In 2017 I fell pregnant again and I was excited as I was going to have a baby girl. That excitement was short lived when at 18 weeks Amber was stillborn. It was one of the hardest & darkest days of my life. 

The recovery emotionally was slow and while I appeared okay on the outside - inside I didn’t care about my health, my body or anything much anymore. I felt I’d failed my baby and that what happened was somehow my fault. I quit HM and gave up on myself. I functioned and loved caring for my toddler but was far from my best.

While life went on and I slowly became more myself again my already damaged & fragile self image had taken a real hit. I was 75kg and thought of myself as fat, ugly and useless. The diet search began and once more I was obsessed with chasing that same 54kg body I had at 23 but now I was 45 and it was totally unrealistic. 

I jumped from one diet plan to the next seeking a new result from repeating the same mistakes. I was determined to be “skinny” before I turned 50 and was officially “old”. Every failure was further proof that I was not good enough.

I was at the point of just giving up and accepting that I would never be a healthy weight and have a good relationship with food or myself. 

Then I saw that Rhian had started Zing Wellbeing.

I was excited. She had been my inspiration back in the day when she owned Healthy Mummy.

Well that day turned out to be much more important than I knew at the time. Soon after I signed up as a Founding Member. At first I just read bits and pieces and didn’t really get too involved for fear of failing again. But something clicked.

I turned 50 in October 2024 and it finally dawned on me that my entire life had revolved around dieting and my body image. I had missed so many opportunities because I thought I was too ugly, too fat and not enough.

I had thought I had understood this at various stages in my journey but while I said I did inside I never believed in myself.

Photo's above: On the left was taken a couple of days ago. On the right was 2022.

I thought I was good back then but now I see the smile did not reach my eyes at all. 

Today I am happier, more confident and have much better mental health. That is all thanks to Zing Wellbeing. I’ve learnt to be kind to myself, nourish my body with good food, nourish my mind with positive energy and my heart with joy. 

I was so busy caring for everyone else that I didn’t care about me. 

This journey has taught me that the way I feel inside is so much more important than the number on the scales or others opinions. I’ve battled with depression, low self esteem, lack of confidence and body image issues all my life but while I still have the odd bad day - thanks to Zing they are way less often and not as severe. 

I love this program and this community so much and I’m so grateful for the huge positive impact it has and continues to have on my life💜💚💜

Zing Wellbeing is exactly what I needed. I’ve been working hard on my mindset, my confidence and consistency and learning to be kind to myself and just keep going.

I’m loving all the programs and information on topics like stress, behaviour change, mindset, sleep and the focus being on being healthy and the best version of myself.

The community of supportive like minded women is amazing and being able to help others by sharing my very personal struggle has given me a sense of purpose again. 

I’m beyond grateful to be a Zing Squad member and hope that this is just the beginning of the best of the rest of my life.